Things are looking fine right now. *smiles* My days in A&E are numbered and somehow, I think I will miss it, although it hasn't been quite fun. Hahaha. I have fun whenever the AN juniors were around though. I 'clicked' much better with them than with the basic juniors. Ntah kenapa kah tu ah? Haha. And they were really a positive thing I look forward to whenever I was there in the A&E. Kira my motivation and strength for me to go through the entire shift. Haha. Funny how other people can have a major impact over you. *smiles again*
Anyway, I'm building my confidence to face my fears. What fears, you may ask? Haha. Adalahhhh tuuu...Hope I'm making the right choice. Making decisions are very difficult and it takes a lot of courage to make one. There is no absolute right nor wrong in making one decision. You either make a decision or not. And only hope that it's not a mistake to be regretted. Huhu.
Aaah...I want to cut my hair again. But mom won't allow me to cut to the *shortest* that I want. *shrugs* I can't go against my mom's words. Anak mithali bah. Haha. Berdosa if melawan cakap mama. She said my haircut is at its best now and must not be anywhere shorter than my current haircut. Maybe my haircut is too boyish for me and makes my mom worried that her rebellious daughter has becoming much 'boyish' for her own good. Hahaha. To top it off, my mom bought my a pair of ear studs. Black star shaped ear studs. Lawa! Kinda rugged jua usulnya~ Haha. I love my mom~ :P Bless her for her motherly love and care.
Him? What news is it of him? Haha. I gathered my courage to chat with him first. I tried to chat in a friendly way, steering clear away from mentioning about my true feelings. He replied at his warmest but sometimes, his words seems to make me pour over my heart's contents. I held back with difficulty, with pain and hope that it's worth it. But the one thing that pains me the most was when..he thought I'm already over him and that I have someone new to replace him due to the fact that I didn't SMSed or MC him like usual for a few months. That really hurts me. He doesn't know that all this time, I am waiting for him and I keep everything inside me because I thought my persistence will make him go further away. I only laughed it off at his words...*sigh* Sometimes, I just think that he...ohh, nevermind. *shrugs*
Aaaahh...I'm counting days til my birthday~~ Yay...I'll be making a wish list later for my birthday. Sesaja bah. Just as a reference for what I want in 2007. Hahaha. Of course, my birthday will be in the fasting month. Wonder what will I buy for my babah? Yatah payah ni kan mikirkan what to give to a guy. Hahaha.
Okay, leave you til here. Later lagi I update. I'm just plain blank in mind right now. :P
Lurve,
Kisho229
"so sad, so hurt that i can see only u in my life..."
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